Self-Doubt and Anxiety: Why We Question Ourselves When Things Feel Uncertain

Have you ever noticed yourself second-guessing decisions or replaying conversations? Perhaps you seek constant reassurance or struggle with imposter syndrome.

If you can relate to any of these, you may be experiencing self-doubt.

Self-doubt is a lack of confidence in yourself, your abilities, your decisions, your opinions, and your self-worth.

Self-doubt often arises in areas of uncertainty, which your brain treats as dangerous.

Many people experience self-doubt in all aspects of their lives, often in response to uncertainty, because it is an evolutionary survival mechanism. When your brain doubts, it’s doing so to protect you. It cautions you not to move forward until you have clarity, or it tries to make up for a lack of clarity by predicting the future, often imagining the worst-case scenario.

This intolerance of uncertainty is often present with anxiety disorders because our brains respond negatively to uncertainty. When you’re dealing with anxiety, your threat detection system can be in overdrive and perceive threats where there are none.

When a threat is perceived, the brain triggers an automatic physiological reaction, activating the sympathetic nervous system to initiate the fight-or-flight response. Self-doubt often triggers self-questioning over situational questioning, turning doubt inward, and the inner critic often appears as a misguided protector.

A few common cognitive distortions that fuel self-doubt include all-or-nothing thinking, personalization, and mind-reading.

Living with constant self-doubt can cost you dearly. Short-term self-doubt can cause decision paralysis, avoidance, or over-reliance on external validation. Long-term self-doubt can erode self-trust, cause you to miss opportunities, and deepen anxiety cycles. All the while, your brain is reassuring you that it’s taking care of you by doubting, but that is not always the case.

If you’re ready to break the cycle of self-doubt, try these five simple practices.

Name your self-doubt.

Name it without becoming it. Self-doubt can feel convincing, so put distance between you and the thought using cognitive defusion. 

Create a list of evidence.

Anxiety has a negativity bias. It focuses on mistakes and tends to ignore successes. Keep a running list of the problems you’ve solved, hard things you’ve survived, and moments you came through even when self-doubt was loud. This list gives you actual data to use to combat self-doubt.

Practice tolerating uncertainty in small doses.

Self-doubt is generally about the discomfort of not knowing. People often over-research, seek reassurance, and rehearse decisions, all of which reinforce self-doubt. Practice sitting with uncertainty by making small decisions without asking for second opinions and resisting the urge to search for information. When you do this, you teach the nervous system that not knowing is survivable. 

Practice self-compassion.

Use Researcher Kristin Neff’s self-compassion practices when you feel overwhelmed by self-doubt:

• Mindfulness: “This is an impermanent moment of self-doubt.”

• Common Humanity: “Other people experience self-doubt as well. Self-doubt is a normal human response to uncertainty.”

• Kindness: “I will be gentle to myself as I navigate this self-doubt.”

Take one small action step.

Self-doubt thrives with inaction, but confidence builds with action. Identify the smallest possible step forward and take it, even with doubt present. This action challenges the belief that you need certainty before you can take action. 

As you go through these steps to overcome self-doubt, be patient with yourself, and be sure to distinguish between anxious self-doubt and healthy self-reflection. Self-doubt, as we’ve established, is typically rooted in fear and negativity. Self-reflection, on the other hand, is rooted in curiosity and seeking understanding for growth.

If you feel overwhelmed by self-doubt to the point where it is negatively impacting your lifestyle, self-talk, or decision-making, it may be time to seek professional help. You can click here to view the services that I provide.

My blog posts are not a replacement for therapy, and the information provided does not constitute the formation of a therapist-patient relationship. The information in my blog posts is general information for educational purposes only and is not intended to be therapy or psychological advice. If you are a current or former client, please remember that your interactions with my blog may jeopardize your confidentiality. Please consult your physician or mental health provider regarding advice or support for your health and well-being.

If you are in crisis, please call your local 24-hour crisis hotline or 911. I am not able to respond to comments or answer questions about your specific situation online. If you are interested in working together, please inquire about appointment availability here.